Below the Surface

On Monday night I had the opportunity to talk to LB.
Even though LB is my brother and we're close as close gets, we don't talk very often. He's busy with his job and his life in the big city and I'm busy with my job and my life here in our small town.

This doesn't mean we don't love each other, it doesn't mean we're bad family, we just believe in quality rather then quantity.

Poor LB, he's having a rough time of it right now.
His job is awesome, his roommate is really cool and is professional life is amazing. He's having a rough go of it was his gf.  For the time being I'll refer to her as Lanky.

Lanky is a great girl. She's funny, smart, beautiful and easy going. But and trust me, there is a big but coming here. She's experiencing what I'd like to call failure to launch syndrome.
She graduated from college A YEAR AGO with an awesome in demand degree. All of her friends with the same degree had jobs lined up prior to graduation. Lanky graduated top of her class, she should be in high demand, she should have a job.
Not so much.

And without getting into a lot of details that I'm not sure LB would be comfortable with me discussing in a public forum, I can tell you this:

LB has supported Lanky as best as he can up to this point. However, LB has a life, a job, responsibilities to respond to and a reputation to uphold. Lanky, doesn't seem to get this.
Lanky doesn't seem to understand it's time to grow up.

LB is a probably more of a grown up then me.
He gets it.

Thus, he's had to put his foot down.
He has told Lanky he won't be seeing her anymore until she can get her act in gear.
Lanky thinks LB is being mean.
Lanky has told LB that he's had it easy because his life has been "planned for him."
Lanky resents LB's success and thinks LB shouldn't be so focused on his job and his success at his job.
This cuts through me like a knife because:
1. LB has planned his own life
2. LB has worked his ass off to create the life he has for himself
3. LB has been determined to be a success for as long as I can remember.
4. GI Joe pulled this very same shit on me
5. I know exactly how LB feels, I remember it very, very well.

LB and I talked about this a lot and while I'm confident he knows how hard he's worked and I know he doesn't feel guilty for his success, I sure he's hurting just the same.

He knows he has to cut the cord. If it all works out and they get back together, it will be for the best and because it was meant to be.
If it doesn't, well, again, it will be for the best and because it wasn't meant to be.

He asked me if the pain from my break up with GI Joe ever went away.
I told him that of course it did. I pointed out all the good things that came into my life when GI Joe left.
I told him how my life just got better.
And it did, it absolutely did.
But the pain? Nope.
It's still just below the surface.

As thankful as I am, as grateful as I am.
The GI Joe roots run deep and from time to time they ache.
Not for the return of a former life.
But because of the loss.
First loves have a way of rooting into you like that.

You never forget them.
And the hurt, it will always be there, just below the surface.

Tales of an HR Expert.... or something like that

My Dad asked me to update his resume today. Being the sweet, loveable, (anal) HR professional of a daughter that I am, I agreed.

"How hard could it be?" I thought

Then he handed be his current resume, from 1988. Our purchasing agent, who was his secratary at the time had typed it for him on her typewritter. It lists my Dad's birthday, my mom and her birthday and my brother and I with our respective ages at the time.

Clearly I thought wrong, now didn't I?


Seeing as in 1988 I was in kindergarten and didn't give two craps about resumes, I have no idea if this was proper procedure or not..... I'm assuming it was the aquanet and the hightop Reeboks that caused people to do such things.

After blowing the dust of his resume and looking over his list of accomplishments for the past 22 years my creative HR skills kicked into gear. I typed up a new resume. Complete with accomplishments, licenses held, degrees, occupations, responsibilties, etc. etc.

If that resume came across an HR Director's desk, I feel confident they would kiss me.

(yes, I really think a lot of myself don't I?.... blame my mother, she told me that some people didn't like me in high school because they were just jealous of my good looks and my smarts.... really people, she still tells me that. In fact, just yesterday, I told her about an old lady that gave me the side eye in the grocery store and my mom said "Honey, she's just jealous because your boobs aren't at your knees" According to my mother, that fact that typically I'm just a bitch has nothing to do with why people don't like me.)

Anyway....

I showed my latest creation to my Dad, in the same fashion I would have showed him a coloring book page as a kingergartener.

His response? Where's my birthdate? Why didn't you put anything down about Mommy? (yes, when asking LB or I about my Mom he calls her Mommy. I know, it melts my heart too)

"Dad," I explained in my best HR Authority Voice, "That information is unnecessary. Not to mention illegal for employers to ask."

"It is?" he questions. "But those are my favorite questions to ask in interviews"

Suddenly, I realize we have a bigger problem then resumes for 1988.


Oh and for the record. The resume is for a appointment to the State Plumbing Licensing Board.... not for a new job.

We you come to work at Family Owned, Inc. and you are an actual family memeber, you have to stay until you die per the rules. And no one dares to eff with our rules, by golly!

LB and the City

This weekend Mr. Berg and I had the pleasure of visiting LB- aka My Little (Way taller then me) Brother in the big city.

LB is a recent college graduate. He got a highly covetted job in the big city and has since been nothing but a success. I couldn't be more proud of him. He's done a lot of things his big sister would be too scared to do.

He moved 2 hours from home to a city he'd never been to before. He found a roommate, got an apartment and settled into the Big City like it has always been his home.

For the record:
After I graduated from college I stayed south, found an apartment and a job and developed a life too. But I played it safe. I stayed in my college town, and even though it was five hours away from home, it was still safe and familiar. So really, I didn't go out on much limb now did I?

LB on the other hand.
Wow-
for a kid that couldn't find his way to Taco Bell a few years ago, he's doing great things. He navigates the city like a pro, granted he does have GPS and once took me on an inpromptu tour of South Jersey. He has tons of friends, joined a baseball league, rides the train, runs the Tow Path. He's seriously amazing.

We spent our Saturday afternoon eating at an amazing Mexican restaurant, walked the downtown area. Window shopped and explored before returning home for some basketball watching.

Later, LB's friend Vinny joined us for an late afternoon cheesesteak (AMAZING!), a tour of LB's most recent construction project and finally settled in at LB's favorite bar for drinks and converstation.

Prior to Vinny's arrival, LB confessed he's been trying to set up a date with a girl he met at work.
He told me a her name and that she's been tending bar at a near by restuarant while working her her master's degree.

Our converstation about her went something like this:

JBerg: So, what does she look like?
LB: I dunno, she's cute. She's my type.
JBerg: So, tall, blonde and big boobs?
LB: She does not have big boobs..... (turns red)

For the record, if you lined up pictures off all LB's girlfriends. With the except of two short lived relationships. All were blonde, tall and had big boobs.

At the bar with Vinny, James again brough up "the new girl" again.

Vinny says: "So, LB, is she cute?"
LB: Beautiful
Vinny: Tall, blonde, big boobs?

Ladies and Gentlemen, my point has been proven!


Thanks LB for a great visit.
Hope it all works out with Blondie :)